It’s the New Year and with that comes goals maybe around taking better care of yourself and/or budgeting your money better.
I don’t usually talk about money in my writing, but I know it’s a BIG trigger for people so I thought we should go there.
It creates stress.
It brings up anxiety.
It causes arguments.
It makes us feel unworthy.
Overall, it may be something you’re actually avoiding more than you should.
According to the psychologist Carl Jung, what you resist, persists.
What did he mean by that? Basically he realized that his patients who were resisting (hiding, denying, or covering up) aspects of themselves would have those aspects enlarge and draw energy into the cycle of resistance. When you have resistance, the problem remains and even may get bigger. The resistance we feel usually has to do with shame or striving to be perfect. So we then ignore it until the resistance is the “elephant in the room” and we don’t know how to deal with it.
When it comes to money, this tends to happen. We don’t learn how to budget properly. We have no idea how to save or even balance a checkbook. We avoid spending money on things that really matter, which makes us sad. Then we get so stressed and overwhelmed so we totally avoid it. (I personally think finances should have been a large focus in high school but that is a topic for another day)
“I can’t afford it” may be something you hear yourself say outloud or in your head more often than not. What are you saying no to? Do you feel like you’re missing out on experiences, education, etc. because you don’t know if you can afford it?
I totally get it. When I was trying to decide to go to nutrition school while I was in college, I had NO idea how I was going to pay for it. I had to pay out of pocket and my parents couldn’t help me out since my dad was recently disabled and the economy basically sucked.
But deep down I knew I didn’t want to say no to this opportunity that could potentially save my life.
(I had no idea the true impact it would make until later of course)
So I worked multiple jobs, attended my college classes and did my nutrition work online any chance I had. I lived paycheck to paycheck but I knew it was what I was meant to be doing.
It gave me motivation and passion that I was craving in my young adulthood. Those courses totally changed my health and future. I honestly was on a path of being very overweight, diabetic, depressed, anxious and living a life that didn’t make me happy...
Looking back, I am so grateful that I listened to my gut and didn’t let “I can’t afford it” hold me back any longer. I realized then that I never wanted to say that annoying phrase ever again. That decision made me value my mind, body and life more than anything else. I learned that investing in myself and my future is essential and I haven’t looked back.
I could honestly have this money conversation all day but I am curious, what are you resisting or not investing in right now that would help your life?
Maybe you want to:
Whatever it is, write it down and make a plan. Seek out advice. Do the research to see if it’s the right fit for you right now.
Maybe you are spending quite a bit on takeout food, drinks, clothes, makeup, and other things that feel good in the moment but add up to a significant sum of money at the end of the year.
Are these things worth you missing out on your dreams?
I recently read about a guy who was having diarrhea up to 15 times a day.
His doctor’s weren’t helping him resolve it and he knew if he didn’t figure it out, his life would continue to be negatively impacted, especially with his young child.
So he decided he needed to invest in alternative ideas, which insurance wouldn’t cover.
Oh, and he was broke.
He went to the bank and started a “health account”, where he would deposit 2-10% of his paycheck every week. Well, he saved money and starting investing in his health with supplements and certain food, which drastically improved his quality of life. Now he is helping others and making money doing it.
I have talked to people who said they can’t afford a financial advisor, mentor, personal trainer, or coach to help them with their health, business, and life goals. On this, I mostly call BULLSHIT.
Is it really true? Or is it an excuse to not put the effort in?
If you want something bad enough, you find a way.
If your best friend needed money to save her child’s life, I bet YOU would find a way. There is always a way. You just need to get creative and think outside the box instead of hiding behind excuses that keep you stuck exactly where you are today.
And if you’re fine where you are, spending your money on whatever you spend it on, then good for you! But if you want things to be different, start with changing your thoughts.
My biggest piece of advice today? Stop saying, “I can’t afford it”. It appears as lack and that lack will persist if you don’t do anything about it.
I often work with my clients around their money struggles because it creates such anxiety. While I am writing this a client literally sent me a message that was too good not to share:
“I did it Shayna!!! I went through over ten years of finance papers...It took me almost 20 years to get over my anxiety, enough to sort through the paper and develop a personalized finance tracking system and I did it in the first week of 2017...Thank you so much for helping me on this journey of growth and success”.
So there is my two cents (no pun intended) for the day. Take it or leave it. But if 2017 is the year to invest your time, energy and money more wisely, I believe in you. It’s about you believing in you now.
With some tough love,
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